Clay

Ever since i was little i’ve felt like a fresh and moist piece of clay.

In the beginning, people around me like my parents and my own brothers and sister were like the hands who gave shape to what i’ll later become. The situations i found myself in, the decissions i made were primarily so because of how i was shaped from the beginning. So, in a way, my parents and my brothers have a lot to do on how i am today.

Later when i grew up and no longer depended so much on my parents, i started to give shape to myself by choosing the people i wanted to be surrounded by. I was more confortable spending time and being around certain people than others because of various reasons that i felt appropiate in different points of my life. Those people i called my friends.

I’ve got in contact with many people and i’ve stayed in contact with a few. Probably and even without awareness sometimes, I picked people with certain personalities. People that had aspects in their lifes that i appreciated and in a way, i wanted them to become part of me. Take it from them, or better said, copy them and make whatever the quality they had a part of my own.

I’ve come to a point now when im starting to see that i’ve also chosen the people i dislike. Not my enemies, but people i wouldnt like to be around and people i wouldnt like to be alike. The same way i got close to the people i respected and admired, i also defined the people i didnt like, and in a way, i’ve tried to become the opposite of what they represent. So indirectly, they’ve also shaped how I am.

As the saying goes “becareful of what you wish, because you might get it”. And i’d have to say “becareful of what you dont wish, because you might get it too”.

I gotta be careful of whom i hate as much as whom i like because both will make an impact on me.

Of course, the fresh and moist clay is becoming drier and harder as time passes by, and soon, there wont be any more shaping, but keeping the integrity of the structure safe from being broken.

As my personality and beliefs that were once like clay become more and more solid, my perception of things change, and the sense of right and wrong have deeper roots in me.