30.Jan

Today was my birthday (it still is, since its 20h40).

I didnt do anything special really, cos i was kinda busy all day but i did receive LOADS of sms, calls, emails and regular mails which made me really happy.

I was amazed of the numerous friends that remembered my birthday. That was a great gift for me.

Even if it might sound too filosophycal, that was more than enough. Friendship you cannot buy or trade.

If the saying “He who has a friend, has a treasure”  is right, i can take myself as a multi-billionaire.

SO HAPPY FOR ALL THE GREETINGS.

Thanks, and till next year!

MiG

Feeling Much Better

Good morning,

I’m writing today to let you know i’m feeling much better now, and that i managed to handle my probs back again.

Here’s how i did it:

The very first day i wrote the Mental breakdown post, 2 friends called me up and gave me support (probably, you’re one of them.Thank you). Then i started thinking.

First thing i did was: “What would i tell to someone who is like me”…And a sentece came up to my mind:

“Act the way you’d like to be, and soon you’ll be the way you act”.

And so i did, even if i wasnt feeling in my best moment, i started to act “as if”. It aint easy and i couldnt fake it the whole day. Not even the first few days. I went to up and downs which i considered normal, but still…As Morpheus said to Neo:

“It is different to know the path than to walk the path”

Or in other words, “its always easier to say things than to do them”.

The thing is that it started to work out fine and i was getting better and feeling less stressed.

About the pressure on the To-Do-List and the reason for all the Mental Breakdown thing, i simply wipped off all my duties, and started from O again. I got rid of the things that didnt affect me directly and that others could handle.

On wednesday, i finally found what my main stress-maker was: Some Lab exercises i had to get done by friday. Everytime i tried work on that, i just got frustrated cos i couldnt get the task done, i was running out of time and on top of that, i had an exam on friday too for which i didnt have time to study cos i was spending/wasting all my time on the Lab thing and i couldnt get it finished.

So what i did was the only possible thing i came up with: Let the exercises go. I emailed the teacher and told him i wasnt gonna be able to hand out the exercises before monday, cos if i tried to get them finished by friday, i wasnt gonna have any time left to study at all and i wasnt gonna get the thing done anyways. So i chose, and chose to let go and start to study.

The study wasnt enough and im sure i wont pass the exam, cos 2 days of study is never enough BUT i dont care so much about it. What i do care about is that i was able to let go and decide, and after that i did my best. I’ve learned the lesson and i hope i’ll get to that point earlier next time and not 2 days before deadline.

Im happy for that and thankful for your support. Its been like the sparkle to start the engine and has made the whole process begin. Without it i wouldnt had been able to come up to this point in such a short period of time.

Thanks!

State of Mind

I found out this singer recently and just love it.

20h00: Mental Breakdown

It finally happened last weekend.

After a crappy week full of work and things to do, shit started to pile up around me and i had no idea which one to go for first.As i was undecided, trying to figure out the best way, the things just kept on comming without stop and i started to feel more and more fed up with the situation.

I was mad at myself and quite stressed by saturday evening. People around me seemed to give me just problems to be solved and no one came to me trying to help me or even ask me how i was doing.

In fact, thinking about the year so far, i can count with the fingers of one hand the number of people who have come to me asking me “hello, what can i do for you?”.

I’m quite proud on myself, and find pretty hard to ask for help cos i really dont think i need it most of the time, but i found out that i need mental support to carry on when the going gets tough. Feed back on what i do, know i’m doing the right thing (even if i know it myself, i’m glad to hear it from someone else from time to time). I’m not asking for a cheerleader to give me some fake happiness. I’m talking about facts. Its difficult. The balance between “being close” and “being over”.

I let people get as close as they want to as long as they’re confortable and i’m ok with it too. But i never let anyone get over me. Or at least i try. Try to set the limit line. How far can they go with me.

I cant stand people who are over me, in my vital space, rushing me and pushing me. I get annoyed pretty quickly when that happens and i get usually mad. Tend to close myself and that’s one of the main reasons why i guess it’s hard to help me when i’m that way.

I havent been able in all these years to fake my mood. Whenever i was mad at someone for some reason, and that got me into a bad mood, i was in that mood with everyone i met. I know it could have been unfair, but i just cant fake being happy and smily when i’m stressed and mad inside. Not for a long time at least.

I need time and space. I always get out of my shell, but i need time. Time to get over the things that have happened, give them a second thought and try to see them from another point of view.

I usually can do this on the run as things happen, clear up my mind and go with it. But sometimes, some bits remain and when i have many things running at the same time, the bits can become problems, sometimes the small things are so many that they’re bigger than the big things.

When time is a luxury and things need to be done before a deadline, stress rise like the foam of the beer. Nothing can stop it and it finally poors out of the jug. A Mental Breakdown.

I think anyone blocks once in a while, it’s normal. I think it happens to everyone, but what defines a person is how quickly they get out of the situation. How can they manage the probs and how they get out of their problems.

Everyone can do well when everything goes smoothly and downhill. That’s quite easy. But when things start to go uphill and hard the situation change, and people do one of these things:

1.- Give up, do nothing but complain about the situation
2.- Try to keep on with everything and realize too late they cant take so many things alone
3.- Let go things and keep on just with the important ones. Make a decission, dont complain.
4.- Ask for help and try to get everything done with the help of other people.

Lately i’ve been doing more number 2 and 4, but there has come a time when i realized its impossible do do everything. I got to that point on saturday evening.

My first thought was to go for 1, and i did for a while that afternoon, but then i found 3 as the best possible way. It wasnt easy and i’m still trying to find a way know what to go for…

Make things happen

Loads of people come up with excuses when they dont get things done.

Most of these excuses are most of the time because of something they didnt have control of.

“It wasnt my fault”,”It didnt want to work”,”I wish i could”…

The reality is we make things happen when its important for us. You make it work even if, apparently it was impossible. If something is in your top 10, you make it happen.

You make time out of nowhere to be with your friends or girlfriend/boyfriend, you make money to pay the bills of your house or car, you make anything that is needed in order to acomplish the task or the goal. Things you’ve never could imagine you could do until you did ‘em.

The only thing you need for a thing to happen is beliefs. Believe its going to work. No matter what, you get it.

Some of you might thing…”well mig, that’s not exactly that way…”. To all you, i have to say:

“THEY DIDNT KNOW IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE, AND THEY DID IT”

This is true. There is always a way, and if you put your mind into something, you’ll get it. Humans have done it since they started to walk.

You have to believe it first though, which ain’t that easy. But once you get to that point, its very hard to stop you. ‘Cos even if the doors towards your goal close, you’ll find another way to get through. You’ll go over it. Cant do that?…you’ll go under it. Can’t do that?…you’ll go round it…If you couldnt make it on your first try, you’ll develop a new skill, get better and go for a second try.

DONT ASK FOR LESS PROBLEMS. ASK FOR MORE SKILLS to face the problems.

No matter what your goal is, you’ll achieve it if you think you can. Nothing is impossible, it just takes time (for you to develop the right skills). Some people will give up before they get to the goal because their frustration overcame their beliefs.

Believe in yourself, cos that will give you motivation to face the hard times, that will make you stand up when you fall and that will keep you going when apparently there wont be a road to follow.

Believe in your skills. They will help you get to where you want. You’ll develop new ones through your journey and you’ll forget those who are not important.

That’s the secret to make things happen.

And yes, i believe in all this i write and practice it in my daylife as much as i can.

Reframing

A “frame” is what some people would call to your state of mind, mindset, mental attitude or just mood at a certain point in your life. And therefore, “refraiming” refers to resetting your state of mind at will.

Its nothing new and i’ve been aware of it before, but its something that has been running around my head lately and here are some thoughts:

As someone said, every situation depends on which glass you look through (this translation sucks, but i hope you get the main idea out of it). This sentence is so true. Anything depends on where you are now and what your background has been until this very moment.

Sometimes, “you’re not in the mood” to do something. Some others, you want to do something but you just “dont feel like doing it right now”. This is all because of how we feel, and how we feel depends on how we THINK we feel. It’s all a state of mind.

Of course, there are certain things or situations that are hard to deny: If you’re standing in the middle of a mountain in winter, with icy wind blowing and you think you’re cold…its because you are. It’s physically impossible to feel warm in that situation because the enviroment is telling you the opposite.

Lets get away a little bit away of that extreme situation and say you are in your house.5th floor.8 pm. A freezing breeze blows in your face and you start thinking about how cold this winter is being. Your mindset is at that moment: Its winter, its cold. Its normal. I dont enjoy this cold so i’ll shut the window cos i aint enjoying this at all.

If you can make an effort and try to imagine its not January but mid july. Its been a long hot day and, as the evening falls, the air starts to cool down. Now you’re in a summer night.5th floor.8 pm. A freezing breeze blows in your face and you start thinking about how good it feels after one of the hottest days in this summer. You enjoy this cold, wish it would last forever and a smile shows up in your face.

Same situation. Different states of mind.

I’ve been thinking about this lately because “i dont feel in the mood to study”. I’m saying to myself…as soon as they kill me in this game, i’ll start. Or, at 10h14 i’ll open the book and start reading right away. As soon as someone calls, i’ll start…I’ll start a countercount from 10 to 0. As soon as i say “zero”, i’ll open the book…Nothing works and i’ve been thinking about it.

Why is it not working?

The approach to the reframing is different. The first one is an active reframing. The change comes from the inside and the individual makes an effort to change the situation. You have to make yourself believe in something and that’s not that simple sometimes. The second is passive. One waits for something to happen. Hopes for an external thing that will click one state of mind without requiring one any effort. Like magic. And that’s never gonna happen.

You can also apply the State of mind idea to many other facts in your life, for example: Being lucky, unlucky, being happy or sad…It’s all a state of mind really. Your mind filters the information from your enviroment and takes only the information that reassures his mindset at that moment.

If you’re happy, you start thinking about the many happy things that have happened to you today. Even if it was a neutral thing, you take the positive side out of it. On the other hand, if you think you’re out of luck, miserable and therefore you should be sad, your mind will filter all the information focusing only in the bad things. Even if you win a car you’d still say “yeah…”great”…but how much is this gonna cost me to maintain it?”…

To sum up cos this post is being a bit longer than usual. Set your mind to whichever state you want to. You gotta do it yourself and do it with a positive and active attitude. It wont be easy and you’ll fail a couple of times before you get it but remember the reward at the end of that road will be huge.

DONT WAIT, ACT NOW NOW

Here is a hint: “Act the way you’ll like to be, and soon you’ll be the way you act”

Recovering…

What a great ending of the year i had…

After not being able to go snowboarding the first week of December (due to the lack of snow in the whole Europe), the chances of seeing the slopes again in 2006 were very low. Fortunatately a great plan came up:

Granada with my cousin Iñaki

The weekend was awesome. Started on Saturday after lunch, Iñaki picked me up and we headed down to Granada. Got to my cousin’s friends appartment and talked till late.

Sunday morning, up at 7.Brakefast on the run and up the mountain. I gotta make a confession here: I put some weight since summer, and i found it a bit hard (well, not just because of the extra kilos, but also b’cos of the lack of exercise since Sept). Anyways, i had a good time. We snowboarded till 16h00 and then went back to the appartment. Hot wonderful recovery shower. I love those after-slopes showers….

A few people came to Belen’s place (my cousin’s friend) and we started eating and drinking. We celebrated New Year’s Eve with the 12 grapes. Then, the serious drinking started. Haha. Nah…i didnt drink that much cos i was feeling tired, but anyways, we hit some pubs and stayed till 6 am. Great ambience over there. We went to pubs next to the slopes.

Monday 10 am. Up up up. We had the whole day ahead to keep on riding our boards, and so we did. The day started hard, but it all eased down after a few rides. We went back to the appartment at 18h. Packed, had some leftovers outside the house, with the car as a table, freezing our hands out because of the cold, but with a splendid-breath-taking view of the red sunset sky from the top of Sierra Nevada’s mountains. What a view.

We headed back to madrid and were on our way at 20h00. Made it to my house in Madrid at 0h30. I took a shower, unpacked and went straight to bed.

Tuesday morning.6h30. I woke up to go to Alcalá, took the bus and train and got to the Lab. What a weekend!

The year started with a few thoughts:

1.- I love snowboarding

2.- I will have to lose some serious weight if i wanna enjoy 1 fully

3.- I have a great life. I like who i am, where i’m at and look forward for a life-changing 2007